Wasn't it cool?
I'm quite maggot.
*The sound of E.T walking was made by someone squishing their hands in jelly*
Hooroo all!
Friday, February 20, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
# 20 - I want tube socks.
Have you ever had random cravings for things?
I woke up this morning really REALLY craving wedges with Sweet Chilli and Sour Cream.
At the moment, I could really go for a Yeeros.
Probably in 5 minutes, i'd really crave a good glass of wine.
And in 6 minutes, i'd crave pretzels.
Mmm... food.
Thought #1 - Slow walkers.
Don't you just hate the people that walk so ridiculously slow in front of you? Especially in a fairly crowded shopping complex or like, the isle in a supermarket, they're everywhere! And just when you go to overtake them, they move in the direction, so you need to dance behind them, so you look like an impatient asswipe.
Its the same with driving. You'll get stuck behind a stupid truck or a stupidly slow driver in a one-lane area. I always get this on the way to uni! GAHH!! Fail!!
Why didn't I think of this?
Why oh why must there be slow people!
Actually, this was put forward to me before, and I think its a pretty good point:
Young people always drive fast and usually walk fast everywhere, but they've got all their lives ahead of them, yet elderly people drive slow and walk fairly slow yet they've got less time (assuming) to live than the younger people. It doesn't make sense!
Oh yeah, slow walkers!
Also, Its hard in like, a crowded marketplace or something, even the showbag area in the Easter show, there's always a poor overweight man who's stuck in the middle, kinda used as a roundabout for everyone or everyone hides behind him so they can move forward cause he's a good blocker. Actually, its kinda one of those things you laugh at, but you'll feel a bit bad for laughing at it. Its like if they ride a motorbike, you'll laugh because it looks disproportionate.
He's going to the drive-thru for maccas, walking to it is too hard
HAHAHAHAHA.
I wanna be like him.
... not.
Thought #2 - The stupidest toys ever made.
No wonder kids are getting stupider. Many many many toys out there are getting absolutely ridiculous. You just look at them and go.... "Who the hell would buy that????"
Some examples I've found (on the internet, there's more, but its takes AGES to find!):
Actually, i'd probably get that last one... LOL
... damn it takes AGES to find good pictures...
*"Formicophilia" is the fetish for having small insects crawl on your genitals*
Hooroo all!
I woke up this morning really REALLY craving wedges with Sweet Chilli and Sour Cream.
At the moment, I could really go for a Yeeros.
Probably in 5 minutes, i'd really crave a good glass of wine.
And in 6 minutes, i'd crave pretzels.
Mmm... food.
Thought #1 - Slow walkers.
Don't you just hate the people that walk so ridiculously slow in front of you? Especially in a fairly crowded shopping complex or like, the isle in a supermarket, they're everywhere! And just when you go to overtake them, they move in the direction, so you need to dance behind them, so you look like an impatient asswipe.
Its the same with driving. You'll get stuck behind a stupid truck or a stupidly slow driver in a one-lane area. I always get this on the way to uni! GAHH!! Fail!!
Why didn't I think of this?Why oh why must there be slow people!
Actually, this was put forward to me before, and I think its a pretty good point:
Young people always drive fast and usually walk fast everywhere, but they've got all their lives ahead of them, yet elderly people drive slow and walk fairly slow yet they've got less time (assuming) to live than the younger people. It doesn't make sense!
Oh yeah, slow walkers!
Also, Its hard in like, a crowded marketplace or something, even the showbag area in the Easter show, there's always a poor overweight man who's stuck in the middle, kinda used as a roundabout for everyone or everyone hides behind him so they can move forward cause he's a good blocker. Actually, its kinda one of those things you laugh at, but you'll feel a bit bad for laughing at it. Its like if they ride a motorbike, you'll laugh because it looks disproportionate.
He's going to the drive-thru for maccas, walking to it is too hardI wanna be like him.
... not.
Thought #2 - The stupidest toys ever made.
No wonder kids are getting stupider. Many many many toys out there are getting absolutely ridiculous. You just look at them and go.... "Who the hell would buy that????"
Some examples I've found (on the internet, there's more, but its takes AGES to find!):
Actually, i'd probably get that last one... LOL
... damn it takes AGES to find good pictures...
*"Formicophilia" is the fetish for having small insects crawl on your genitals*
Hooroo all!
Friday, February 13, 2009
# 19 - The legendary post of random ranting.
Actually, all my posts have been random.
Oh yeah!
But come to think of it, i kinda pre-meditate material sometimes. Like, i come across a situation one day, and i try and make it funny. Key word = try!
Banana Terracotta Pie (a rotating cookie will be given to people who know where this is from)
Anyhoo, onto some thoughts!
Thought #1 - Some people are just... 'special'
Yup
Have you got one of those mates that's usually just a bit on the 'special' side. Who you'll laugh at, but won't laugh with because most of their jokes are lame?
I'm usually that guy. HAHAHA.
Actually, sometimes I get a laugh. W3rd. Those are happy times.
But seriously. We all know one. They're slightly 'special'. I know i'm one, but I know a few. That means that the ratio of 'special' to 'normal' is getting lower (for those who don't know math, that means there's more special people coming!). I think its from a lack of discipline! Parents need to beat their kids more often! If kids get beaten, it'll make the world a happier place. Like, all the parents these days are like 'back in my day, the younger generation had more respect", That's cause they all got whacked over the head if they gave even a funny look!
And we should bring back the caning in school!
Actually... maybe the canings in school back then helped create the 'special' people of today...
Anyhoo... here's a picture of a bunny with a pancake on its head.
Thought #2 - Novelty ring tones and the other stupid shit they try and sell you on late night tv.
Good god, have you seen some of this stuff?
Its completely ridiculous.
It kinda all started with the crazy frog ring tone, which No-one I knew had. It was completely and utterly annoying and stupid, and i don't know how it got its own remixes and so forth. If you bought this or anything like this:
Well Said
And furthermore. Those stupid little bloody things you can 'msg' and get answers to like the stupid "love match calculator" and all that crap. Again - I don't know anyone who has bought these shit-for-brains ideas, maybe because I might have an IQ higher than a pigeon. Again, if you've bought any of these:
Again, well said
And finally, those stupid little animations or the porn you can get on your mobile (Who the hell pays for porn?). Those things are just gay. I mean, for 1 - everyone knows they're not real. 2- Everyone knows where you got it from so you can't "fool your friends" and 3 - You're a fag if you buy it. If you bought them or any other of the products I may have mentioned:
*Avocados are poisonous to birds*
Hooroo All!
Oh yeah!
But come to think of it, i kinda pre-meditate material sometimes. Like, i come across a situation one day, and i try and make it funny. Key word = try!
Banana Terracotta Pie (a rotating cookie will be given to people who know where this is from)
Anyhoo, onto some thoughts!
Thought #1 - Some people are just... 'special'
YupHave you got one of those mates that's usually just a bit on the 'special' side. Who you'll laugh at, but won't laugh with because most of their jokes are lame?
I'm usually that guy. HAHAHA.
Actually, sometimes I get a laugh. W3rd. Those are happy times.
But seriously. We all know one. They're slightly 'special'. I know i'm one, but I know a few. That means that the ratio of 'special' to 'normal' is getting lower (for those who don't know math, that means there's more special people coming!). I think its from a lack of discipline! Parents need to beat their kids more often! If kids get beaten, it'll make the world a happier place. Like, all the parents these days are like 'back in my day, the younger generation had more respect", That's cause they all got whacked over the head if they gave even a funny look!
And we should bring back the caning in school!
Actually... maybe the canings in school back then helped create the 'special' people of today...
Anyhoo... here's a picture of a bunny with a pancake on its head.
Thought #2 - Novelty ring tones and the other stupid shit they try and sell you on late night tv.
Good god, have you seen some of this stuff?
Its completely ridiculous.
It kinda all started with the crazy frog ring tone, which No-one I knew had. It was completely and utterly annoying and stupid, and i don't know how it got its own remixes and so forth. If you bought this or anything like this:
Well Said
Again, well said
*Avocados are poisonous to birds*
Hooroo All!
Sunday, February 8, 2009
# 18 - I have a blogger up my nose.
Have you ever tried to do handstands after swimming?
I always have water come out my nose - even though i was almost dry at the time.
God knows where it came from.
And here I ask the question:
Why is it that phone reception can be so gay sometimes?
I was talking to my brother over the electric mobile telephone, and he was breaking up. I usually pace when I talk on the phone (i don't know why) and it eventually became clear in a certain spot. I had to stand still. It was killing me yo!
unfair!
Anyhoo, onto some thoughts:
Thought #1 - Useless buttons
Have you ever come across useless buttons in your life? Like, I don't think I've really ever used "scroll lock" on the keyboard in my life. But here is a few more which you'll most likely agree with me anyway.
The Close Elevator Door Button:
Case 1
Is it really necessary?
And I swear that it doesn't close it straight away either. You need to push it about 23084623 times until something even happens. Its a useless piece of equipment. Technically, if you don't want anyone disturbing you on your trip up or down the elevator, you should be able to hold this button down, and it'll be lots of fun. You'll get even more enjoyment knowing someone could have gotten on your elevator and didn't because you were a bastard. Har har har.
The 'Bass Booster' button:
Case 2
I think this button should be renamed to "Please stop making the music sound like shit button". Good grief. Without it, you have NO bass. All it's doing is just upping the Bass EQ when you push the button from, most likely, Zero to probably half-way. And its on so many Old school portable CD players and Walkmans. Har har har. Old school!
The Dashboard dimmer switch:
Case 3
Who in the hell uses this thing anyway? You don't need to set a 'mood' in your car. Chances are, if you're having a root in your car, the person you're with won't care if the dash is bright enough or not. And as if you need to dim it in any circumstances anyway, considering the fact that you, you know, NEED to know your SPEED. I don't think that's going to work with the cops.
COP: "You know you were speeding?"
YOU: "No, cause I put the dashboard dimmer down a bit too much and I couldn't see it properly"
COP: "You're an idiot" *passes over ticket*
I'm sure I could think of more but i'm slightly tired.
Thought #2 - Traffic pisses me off.
I think the RTA and Head of Transport in the Government person dude just want to shit us sometimes. Like, for example, who the hell builds an 'express' tunnel to the city with only 2 lanes each way. SMART MOVE. (I'm talking about the M5 of course) and the Stupid M4 bottle-necks from 4 lanes (good) to 2 (stupid). These are MAIN ROADS, you'd think when they created them that they'd go "ok... population of Australia will most likely increase, so lets counteract for it", but Nooo... they do a gay job and they put up stupid road signs to warn us of slow traffic. They should be something like this:
Spot on dude...
Like seriously. I reckon that they're probably trying to fix things, but there's roadwork on the tunnels and stuff once every week or so, and that just shits basically everyone. When my brother and I were coming back from QLD, we had to come to a complete stop 3 times! GAH!! And like, there were lanes closed and everything, and i could not see a good reason for it at all. Like... c'mon. And this happens to me alot. I bet sooner or later, something like this will come up and just tick off everyone:
Oh God Dammit!
Road worker planner people of Sydney - get your act together!
... though I do love singing in the car.
*About 25% of the population sneeze when they are exposed to light.*
Hooroo all!
I always have water come out my nose - even though i was almost dry at the time.
God knows where it came from.
And here I ask the question:
Why is it that phone reception can be so gay sometimes?
I was talking to my brother over the electric mobile telephone, and he was breaking up. I usually pace when I talk on the phone (i don't know why) and it eventually became clear in a certain spot. I had to stand still. It was killing me yo!
unfair!
Anyhoo, onto some thoughts:
Thought #1 - Useless buttons
Have you ever come across useless buttons in your life? Like, I don't think I've really ever used "scroll lock" on the keyboard in my life. But here is a few more which you'll most likely agree with me anyway.
The Close Elevator Door Button:
Case 1And I swear that it doesn't close it straight away either. You need to push it about 23084623 times until something even happens. Its a useless piece of equipment. Technically, if you don't want anyone disturbing you on your trip up or down the elevator, you should be able to hold this button down, and it'll be lots of fun. You'll get even more enjoyment knowing someone could have gotten on your elevator and didn't because you were a bastard. Har har har.
The 'Bass Booster' button:
Case 2The Dashboard dimmer switch:
Case 3COP: "You know you were speeding?"
YOU: "No, cause I put the dashboard dimmer down a bit too much and I couldn't see it properly"
COP: "You're an idiot" *passes over ticket*
I'm sure I could think of more but i'm slightly tired.
Thought #2 - Traffic pisses me off.
I think the RTA and Head of Transport in the Government person dude just want to shit us sometimes. Like, for example, who the hell builds an 'express' tunnel to the city with only 2 lanes each way. SMART MOVE. (I'm talking about the M5 of course) and the Stupid M4 bottle-necks from 4 lanes (good) to 2 (stupid). These are MAIN ROADS, you'd think when they created them that they'd go "ok... population of Australia will most likely increase, so lets counteract for it", but Nooo... they do a gay job and they put up stupid road signs to warn us of slow traffic. They should be something like this:
Spot on dude...Like seriously. I reckon that they're probably trying to fix things, but there's roadwork on the tunnels and stuff once every week or so, and that just shits basically everyone. When my brother and I were coming back from QLD, we had to come to a complete stop 3 times! GAH!! And like, there were lanes closed and everything, and i could not see a good reason for it at all. Like... c'mon. And this happens to me alot. I bet sooner or later, something like this will come up and just tick off everyone:
Oh God Dammit!Road worker planner people of Sydney - get your act together!
... though I do love singing in the car.
*About 25% of the population sneeze when they are exposed to light.*
Hooroo all!
Monday, February 2, 2009
# 17 - Random Question Thingy!
HAHA, i'm bored.
Last beverage → Drinking Beer right now. I know, i actually drink beer! But this is a Heineken! I'm getting used to it.
Last phone call → Your mum
Last instant message → T-Dawg (you know who you are!)
Last song you listened to → Themata by Karnivool.
Last time you cried → Good grief. I think I cried of laughter sometime last year. No wait, i cried this morning because i put my shirt on backwards. The waterworks are coming again now remembering it.....
HAVE YOU EVER:
Dated someone twice → Nope. Except for Miss piggy. She is FINE!
Been cheated on → Yup
Kissed someone & regretted it → I think so. LOL. Oh yeah, it was Kermit. Turned out Kermit was a hobo, not a frog. Dammit!
Lost someone special→ I lost my invisible friend Chunk back in year 6. Poor chunk. I think I left him in Queensland on the plane. My dad sat on him and he never became alive again.
IN THE PAST MONTH HAVE YOU:
Fallen out of love → I don't love chicken as much as I used to. =(
Laughed until you cried → Yup. LOL at peeing in a bottle on the highway (couldn't go outside, cops were around and i can't afford a peeing in public fee)
Met someone who changed your life → In the past month? I met Charles. The lone hair on my chest. it changed my life.
Found out someone was talking about you → Yeah. They were plotting against me. Those people are so sinister. stop plotting!
Have you kissed anyone on your top friends? → Past month? I kissed my dog on the top of the head, does that count?
How many ppl on your top friends do you know in real life? → This question is so dumb, I think i lost IQ points.
How many kids do you want to have → 19. Never said it had to be just with one woman... or man.... or chicken...
Do you have any pets → CLEO, my dim-witted loveable pet labrador who is HUGE (40kgs)
Do you want to change your name → Yup. To Max Power. Just like Homer Simpson. Boy did that get him places!
What time did you wake up today → 9. Stupid Back Spasms!
What were you doing at midnight last night → watching two men get sweaty in a grueling match. (i.e. tennis final)
Name something you CANNOT wait for → My ankle to get better. Damn gutters. I hate them so much!
Last time you saw your father→ I can't remember the last time I saw Darth Vader in star wars. I'm not luke skywalker though. I'm Darth Vader and Chewy's love child.
What's one thing you wish you could change → My right molar. I don't know why.
Have you ever talked to a person named Tom → Isn't he the myspace dude? I think so, but I do't use myspace because its EVIL!
What's getting on your nerves right now → My ankle!
What's your real name → !bubu (pronounced *click* boo boo) Its traditional Nmibian.
Zodiac sign → Gemcer (half gemini, half cancer, cause i was born on the crossover date)
Elementary/primary School → Smitty West Primary! w00t for cheapness!
High School → Bossley Park High School, w00t for cheapness!
Hair color → Blonde. I actually have naturally tri-coloured hair. i have a bit of mouse brown, bit of dark blonde and some golden/white blonde too. YAY!
Long or short → umm... medium length for a guy
Are you a health freak → Yup
Righty or lefty → Wrong!
FIRSTS:
First surgery → Year 2 to get my tonsils out. I woke up about a minute after the operation asking to drink water. LOL!
First piercing → MY nipple! I got it done a couple weeks ago. HAH!
First best friend → Hmm... my invisible friend named Chunk.
First sport you joined → Soccer under 6's. No-one could play properly at that age, and there were probably more tears than goals.
First pet → A budgie which i killed by feeding it grass so it got chronic diarrhoea and died. Poor Lemondrop.
First vacation → To the moon in 1970. I was after the first one and I went there in a dream. This of course was before I was born, so I physically hadn't been on a vacation yet.
First crush → I think her name was Carly, sometime in primary school. Holy crap I was serious for a question!
CURRENTLY :
Eating → smiths original potato chips!
Drinking → Heineken beer. I'm getting used to it! not as good as scotch though!
Waiting → umm.. table 5? Their pasta a la ferret has just arrived
YOUR FUTURE :
Want kids? → 19!
Want to get married?→ ok. Hopefully only once though. And that it'll last.
Careers in mind? → Rockstar or a part time job at the all-you-can-eat pizza hut.
HAVE YOU EVER:
Kissed a stranger → Yes actually. On the cheek though. I got 5 bucks.
Drank hard liquor → HAHA!
Lost glasses/contacts → I lost my special Thomas the Tank Engine glass in kindy =(
Ran away from home → lol, when I was 3, I opened up the remote-control garage door, and ran outside with just a singlet on. Got a fair way as well until my brother caught me.
Broken someone's heart → I don't think I have. I'm usually on the receving end of this, which sucks! Though I pulled a guys heart and pancreas out and switched them before he died. Kung Fu master! Does that count...?
Been arrested → 49 times and counting. All for the same reason - farting in enclosed elevators while cops are around.
Turned someone down → Have I? I don't think so. Maybe I turned them up!
Cried when someone died → I cried when my invisible friend died. Boohoohoo.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
Yourself → I believe in my musical ability, there's a difference.
Miracles → Depends.
Love at first sight → Nope. That's called an erection.
Heaven → Not sure.
Santa Claus → Santa would need to be a robot made of diamonds, but sure!
Kiss on the first date → I usually do before the first date. I rock!
Angels → I believe in the supernatural. I've been serious for a few questions, this is creepy!
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY :
Is there one person you want to be with right now? → umm... i have beer and chips. What do you think?
Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time → HAHAH! I wish! But no, i've never cheated.
Do you believe in God? → Good Question. Lets just say i've slipped off the rails on this one.
Is this questionnaire a waste of time? It isn't if I entertain people with my answers.
Done!
*With two forks and a charge, a pickle will emit light*
Hooroo all!
Last beverage → Drinking Beer right now. I know, i actually drink beer! But this is a Heineken! I'm getting used to it.
Last phone call → Your mum
Last instant message → T-Dawg (you know who you are!)
Last song you listened to → Themata by Karnivool.
Last time you cried → Good grief. I think I cried of laughter sometime last year. No wait, i cried this morning because i put my shirt on backwards. The waterworks are coming again now remembering it.....
HAVE YOU EVER:
Dated someone twice → Nope. Except for Miss piggy. She is FINE!
Been cheated on → Yup
Kissed someone & regretted it → I think so. LOL. Oh yeah, it was Kermit. Turned out Kermit was a hobo, not a frog. Dammit!
Lost someone special→ I lost my invisible friend Chunk back in year 6. Poor chunk. I think I left him in Queensland on the plane. My dad sat on him and he never became alive again.
IN THE PAST MONTH HAVE YOU:
Fallen out of love → I don't love chicken as much as I used to. =(
Laughed until you cried → Yup. LOL at peeing in a bottle on the highway (couldn't go outside, cops were around and i can't afford a peeing in public fee)
Met someone who changed your life → In the past month? I met Charles. The lone hair on my chest. it changed my life.
Found out someone was talking about you → Yeah. They were plotting against me. Those people are so sinister. stop plotting!
Have you kissed anyone on your top friends? → Past month? I kissed my dog on the top of the head, does that count?
How many ppl on your top friends do you know in real life? → This question is so dumb, I think i lost IQ points.
How many kids do you want to have → 19. Never said it had to be just with one woman... or man.... or chicken...
Do you have any pets → CLEO, my dim-witted loveable pet labrador who is HUGE (40kgs)
Do you want to change your name → Yup. To Max Power. Just like Homer Simpson. Boy did that get him places!
What time did you wake up today → 9. Stupid Back Spasms!
What were you doing at midnight last night → watching two men get sweaty in a grueling match. (i.e. tennis final)
Name something you CANNOT wait for → My ankle to get better. Damn gutters. I hate them so much!
Last time you saw your father→ I can't remember the last time I saw Darth Vader in star wars. I'm not luke skywalker though. I'm Darth Vader and Chewy's love child.
What's one thing you wish you could change → My right molar. I don't know why.
Have you ever talked to a person named Tom → Isn't he the myspace dude? I think so, but I do't use myspace because its EVIL!
What's getting on your nerves right now → My ankle!
What's your real name → !bubu (pronounced *click* boo boo) Its traditional Nmibian.
Zodiac sign → Gemcer (half gemini, half cancer, cause i was born on the crossover date)
Elementary/primary School → Smitty West Primary! w00t for cheapness!
High School → Bossley Park High School, w00t for cheapness!
Hair color → Blonde. I actually have naturally tri-coloured hair. i have a bit of mouse brown, bit of dark blonde and some golden/white blonde too. YAY!
Long or short → umm... medium length for a guy
Are you a health freak → Yup
Righty or lefty → Wrong!
FIRSTS:
First surgery → Year 2 to get my tonsils out. I woke up about a minute after the operation asking to drink water. LOL!
First piercing → MY nipple! I got it done a couple weeks ago. HAH!
First best friend → Hmm... my invisible friend named Chunk.
First sport you joined → Soccer under 6's. No-one could play properly at that age, and there were probably more tears than goals.
First pet → A budgie which i killed by feeding it grass so it got chronic diarrhoea and died. Poor Lemondrop.
First vacation → To the moon in 1970. I was after the first one and I went there in a dream. This of course was before I was born, so I physically hadn't been on a vacation yet.
First crush → I think her name was Carly, sometime in primary school. Holy crap I was serious for a question!
CURRENTLY :
Eating → smiths original potato chips!
Drinking → Heineken beer. I'm getting used to it! not as good as scotch though!
Waiting → umm.. table 5? Their pasta a la ferret has just arrived
YOUR FUTURE :
Want kids? → 19!
Want to get married?→ ok. Hopefully only once though. And that it'll last.
Careers in mind? → Rockstar or a part time job at the all-you-can-eat pizza hut.
HAVE YOU EVER:
Kissed a stranger → Yes actually. On the cheek though. I got 5 bucks.
Drank hard liquor → HAHA!
Lost glasses/contacts → I lost my special Thomas the Tank Engine glass in kindy =(
Ran away from home → lol, when I was 3, I opened up the remote-control garage door, and ran outside with just a singlet on. Got a fair way as well until my brother caught me.
Broken someone's heart → I don't think I have. I'm usually on the receving end of this, which sucks! Though I pulled a guys heart and pancreas out and switched them before he died. Kung Fu master! Does that count...?
Been arrested → 49 times and counting. All for the same reason - farting in enclosed elevators while cops are around.
Turned someone down → Have I? I don't think so. Maybe I turned them up!
Cried when someone died → I cried when my invisible friend died. Boohoohoo.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
Yourself → I believe in my musical ability, there's a difference.
Miracles → Depends.
Love at first sight → Nope. That's called an erection.
Heaven → Not sure.
Santa Claus → Santa would need to be a robot made of diamonds, but sure!
Kiss on the first date → I usually do before the first date. I rock!
Angels → I believe in the supernatural. I've been serious for a few questions, this is creepy!
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY :
Is there one person you want to be with right now? → umm... i have beer and chips. What do you think?
Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time → HAHAH! I wish! But no, i've never cheated.
Do you believe in God? → Good Question. Lets just say i've slipped off the rails on this one.
Is this questionnaire a waste of time? It isn't if I entertain people with my answers.
Done!
*With two forks and a charge, a pickle will emit light*
Hooroo all!
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